Posts Tagged ‘find a marriage counselor’
The Advantages Of Seeking A Marriage Counselor
No one wants to admit they need help. The natural human aversion to failure is often so strong that many resist even admitting that the marriage isn’t going as they envisioned it. They endure bitterly silent breakfasts and stay at the pub an hour later just to avoid facing the facts and hoping that things will get better on their own. Or even worse, they will beat themselves up, saying, “I probably deserve this treatment.” Before the morale of your household degenerates further, consider visiting a marriage counselor as a guide through the emotional minefields.
You should endeavor to find a marriage counselor to help you avoid painful emotional outbursts. If you or your spouse spends any amount of time shouting at each other, crying or getting stuck in a constant cycle of derision and nagging, then counseling for marriage can help. Secondly, certified counselors provide added motivation to complete your plan to regain that romantic love again. Sometimes another person’s faith that your efforts will be successful is all you need to believe it yourself. While these may seem like things you might be able to do on your own, the third reason to seek counseling is to gain access to knowledge and strategies to help you achieve your goals. Over the years there have been many studies into human behavior, which can help us recognize our patterns of behavior and remedy the underlying causes of our feelings.
Finding the right marriage counselor can be very important to your success. Often couples look up a few numbers in the Yellow Pages or go with referrals from others. Be sure you choose your marriage therapy guide together, so there is no finger-pointing if the first counselor doesn’t work out. Look for marriage family counselors who have been in practice for at least seven years, who see at least 6-8 couples per week and who have specialized training. Be sure you find a therapist for couples and not just an individual therapist. Also, it’s a good idea to find someone affordable and close by, so there are no excuses to skip a session. Next, call each clinic to determine which counselor seems sincerely interested in you? Do they ask important questions to gather information or do they seem in a hurry to get off the phone with you?
You may be wondering what to expect from a marriage counselor session. During your first visit, you’ll each be quizzed separately, as well as together. You’ll acquaint yourselves with the therapist and establish a rapport. You’ll be asked about why you came to counseling for couples, establish a few goals and work from there. Often you’ll fill out a few questionnaires for the counselor to go over after you’ve left and he or she will come up with a plan for the next session. In the second session, a strategy will be promoted to address the marital problems and the session may last two hours, rather than one. By the end of session two, you’ll have a treatment plan and a few first assignments to work on. You may need to document the amount of undivided attention paid to each other or keep a journal of your progress. Each week you’ll report your successes and failures to the counselor until your goals have been realized.